


In Silence, Where Flowers Sleep

by TheFairieQueen



Series: Yulma Week 2018 [1]
Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Angst, Canon Universe, Devotion, Gen, Isolation, M/M, Pre-Canon, Silence, Solitude, Yulma Week 2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-07
Updated: 2018-05-07
Packaged: 2019-05-03 09:35:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,238
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14566167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFairieQueen/pseuds/TheFairieQueen
Summary: When he woke up, he was alone.  But perhaps if enough time passed, someone else would wake up too.





	In Silence, Where Flowers Sleep

**Author's Note:**

> Day 1 of Yulma Week 2018: Lavender - Silence, Devotion, Solitude. 
> 
> Just a fic I thought, mainly focusing on Alma when he first woke up in the lab before Kanda. 
> 
> Enjoy!

_It was dark, and there was numbness everywhere. It flowed over them, encompassing their essence like a blanket of nothingness – velvety, and imaginary. An illusion of some kind of comfort._  
  
_“Do you know this flower?”_  
  
_Darkness.  It was so dark.  And it was hard to breathe._  
  
_“It’s called a lotus flower.  They rise up from the mud, and fill the world with their sweet fragrance.”_  
  
_But, no – it wasn’t numbness they felt. It was coldness.  Cold and icy; the numbness had only been a result of the frigid prickle at what should have been her – his? Their? – skin.  Somewhere, they felt dirt and gravel, gritty and disgusting, pressing into them all over._  
  
_They were no longer numb, and they burned and itched.  The piercing gravel rubbed into their raw flesh like sandpaper, and was mixed in with something thick and sticky. It smelled like copper._  
  
_“Sound familiar?  They remind me of us.  Of exorcists.”_  
  
_They tried to open their eyes, but it was still dark. And when they tried to speak their words were clogged up, stuffed and oiled with a warm, revolting liquid.  Somewhere, they heard a shout – a man calling for someone, or at least attempting to – though his words were quickly silenced._  
  
_Gentle laughter.  “Oh really?  Even when we’re old?”_  
  
_‘_ Where are you?’  _They wanted to cry and scream, their vocal chords twisted into sand._ ‘Where are you, Yuu-‘  
  
_“I’ll wait for you.  Forever.”_  
  
_They tried to speak, but couldn’t. And it was dark for a long, long time._

* * *

  
  
A gasp escaped him, as his lungs burned for oxygen.  The child’s head had broken the surface of the pool suddenly, as his hands struggled to grip the edge.  The stone felt startling cold and slippery beneath his hold, and the smooth edge made it hard for the child to lift himself up.  He grasped at the edge, trying to hoist himself up – but he felt disoriented, and his long hair was weighed down by the water, clinging to his body and covering his face.  
  
But he kept trying.  For whatever reason, he knew had had to  _keep trying_. As though some beckoning, desperate impulse were guiding his instincts.  
  
In the distance, there were footsteps.  However, the child didn’t notice them; against the splashes and rippling of the water the footsteps were indistinguishable to him. He only knew he had to get out of the water.  
  
“One of them’s awake!” Someone shouted.  
  
The child paused, finally taking note of the fact that he weren’t alone.  His eyes were hazy, and confused.   _‘One…of them…?’_  
  
Deep down, the child felt a pang of yearning.  For what, he didn’t know. He couldn’t remember.  
  
Someone came, and helped the child out of the pool.  They pulled him up swiftly, and the child shivered as his body was enveloped by frigid air.  A towel was quickly wrapped around him.  
  
There was the sound of at least a few other people coming, their voices blending together and talking about things the child didn’t understand.  They all wore long white coats, but the child didn’t stare at them for long.     
  
Turning, the child looked back at the pool.  He saw there were more pools – like tiny, individual ponds spread out.  
  
Near one of the pools, the child saw flowers.  But he was ushered away before he could look any longer.  


* * *

  
  
They told him his name was Alma, and that he was an apostle of God.  
  
Alma didn’t really understand what an apostle was.  The scientists acted like it was a good thing, so Alma tried to be happy.  He tried to smile, but it was hard.  The labs felt so empty at times, and the tests  _hurt_  – Alma didn’t entirely comprehend why they were necessary.  He didn’t entirely comprehend why it was so imperative to synchronize with innocence, and why it was worth it to destroy his body again and again-  
  
_‘It hurts so much.’_  
  
The pain never stopped, and Alma felt alone.  
  
Except in the birthing chamber.  That was what it was called – the place where Alma had woken up.  The pools, or “wombs”, each contained another apostle, sound asleep and peacefully contained.  Alma often retreated there, especially after the tests had been completed for the day.  He liked to go to the birthing chamber first thing in the morning too, always greeting the apostles as though they could hear him.  
  
They never responded, but Alma liked to think that perhaps they were listening. Maybe they would hear Alma, and wake up soon.  
  
Alma swung his feet over the edge of one of the pools.  He knew he probably shouldn’t have been doing such; Dr. Edgar had warned him not to, since it was so slippery around the edges.  But it was so difficult to talk to the other apostles when Alma felt so far away from them.  At least if he was within close physical proximity, Alma could focus on the apostles while reading to them at the same time.  
  
That was what Alma liked to do most when talking to the apostles – he liked to read them things.  
  
Kicking his feet back and forth, Alma glanced down at the one sleeping apostle.  “This says there are over 300 different kind of dog breeds in the world!  Can you believe how much that is?” Alma was gushing excitably.  “I can show you pictures when you wake up.  But there aren’t any real ones here…”  
  
There was a tinge of disappointment in Alma’s voice as he stated that last part.  He had asked Dr. Edgar if there were any real dogs or animals around, but animals apparently weren’t allowed in the lab.  Dr. Edgar had managed to get Alma a stuffed rabbit, though – which had been nice.  It wasn’t a dog, but Alma could pretend it was real for the time being.  
  
Silence filled the room after Alma stopped speaking.  It made Alma uncomfortable, so he read some more out loud.  “This also says dogs are man’s best friend,” He read, before his eyes lit up as he looked at the apostle.  “Oh!  When you wake up, we should be best friends!  No one else has woken up yet, so I don’t really have any.”  
  
An afterthought passed through Alma’s mind, and he looked down at the sleeping apostle with urgency.  “Uh, don’t tell the other apostles though!” He quickly added.  “I don’t want them to get their feelings hurt…”  
  
Alma continued to look down at the apostle, who had not once stirred from his fetal position.  The only movement made was the slight sway of his long, dark hair beneath the surface of the water.    
  
“I wonder if you’ll have to cut your hair too.  The scientists cut mine,” Alma spoke, changing the subject.  “But if you like it I’m sure they’ll let you keep it!  I didn’t mind cutting mine since it was sort of annoying, and it kept  _tangling_.”  
  
Alma swung his feet a few more times, and paused.  But like always, he was greeted with silence.   _‘It’s so quiet here…’_  
  
Alma continued to look down at the apostle, eyes wistful.  “I hope you wake up soon …”

* * *

  
  
It had been 182 days since Alma had woken up, and still he was alone.  
  
Every morning was the same.  He would go before anyone else was awake to where the other apostles slept, and stay there for a while to talk to them or to read them things.  Overtime, Dr. Edgar had given Alma a few more books.  They were mostly different types of picture books, encyclopedias, or dictionaries, but they were enthralling to Alma all the same.  Reading had come easily to Alma, almost eerily so, and the child often sped through those books at a surprisingly quick rate.  
  
This was also likely because Alma didn’t have much else to do in the labs, with the exception of undergoing test after test after test. There were the other scientists around, but Alma couldn’t always talk to them; they were busy a lot of the time.  
  
So, reading became yet another form of solace.  
  
The books that talked about the world outside of the labs were probably Alma’s favorite. He enjoyed reading about the sky, and often wondered if he would ever get to see it.  
  
Alma didn’t have any books with him this morning, though.  He had come empty-handed, partly because Alma knew he wouldn’t have as much time this morning as normal.  The child had been so exhausted from the previous day’s tests that he had collapsed into bed, nearly falling apart limb from limb as his body strained to regenerate.  As a result, Alma had accidentally slept in later than normal.  
  
Sometimes, the tests just wore on Alma.  
  
Alma tried to ignore a shiver that threatened to ripple throughout his body.  It was cold, but he hadn’t bothered to grab his overshirt.  Alma had been in such a rush to at least tell the apostles good morning that he had neglected to think about his own comfort.  
  
Well, one apostle.  Alma had wanted to tell  _one_  apostle good morning.  
  
Alma didn’t intend to play favorites; it wasn’t fair to the other apostles. But, for whatever reason Alma always gravitated to the same pool.  It was as though Alma just couldn’t help himself – there was an instinctual pull, almost to where Alma felt an odd unspoken loyalty to the apostle who slept within it.  
  
Alma had learned this apostle’s name first: Yuu.  
  
Of course, Alma had learned all of the names of the apostles.  But Yuu was different.  Alma couldn’t tell how or why, but he just knew that one day Yuu would wake up.  At least, Alma _hoped_ Yuu would – sometimes Alma would get scared that maybe no one else would wake up, and that he would be left alone.  
  
“Good morning!” Alma chirped down into the pool.  “I woke up late, so I didn’t bring any books today – but Dr. Edgar said he might have a new one for me!  Maybe I can bring it back after my tests are finished today!”  
  
Like every day, the sound of empty air was all there was to greet Alma, and like every day Alma felt a small pang of disappointment.  “It’s been a while…do you think you might wake up soon?  The tests can be hard, and I know it’s really dark here, but…”  
  
Words trailing, Alma found himself struggling to validate why it would be so much better to wake up and live in the lab.  An unexpected, nauseous sensation churned within him.    
  
He swallowed.  “It’d…it’d just be really nice to have someone else awake with me…”  
  
No response.  
  
Alma exhaled, his breath shakier than anticipated.  He noticed his eyes felt hot as well, and he tried to blink the tears away before they could start.  It was early, and Alma didn’t want to cry.  
  
Anyways, Alma should have known better.  He should have known that no one would be awake yet.  Not even Yuu.  
  
Yet, he kept hoping.  Alma kept hoping, and it was undeniably  _torturous_.  
  
Biting his lip, Alma pulled back from leaning over the edge of the pool.  He would have to leave the birthing chamber soon.  
  
A small bit of movement caused Alma to freeze.  
  
At first, Alma wondered if he had possibly imagined it.  Perhaps all of that wishing and yearning had finally started to impact even his imagination, causing Alma to hallucinate.  But now Alma’s hopefulness threatened to spike, which he knew he should have monitored; it would only lead to more disappointment if he weren’t careful.  
  
_‘But…’_  
  
“Hey…” Alma started, as he peered over at the pool.  “Can you hear me?”  
  
Another small shift.  Alma’s eyes widened slightly, but he didn’t allow himself to rejoice just yet.  He needed to be sure.  “If you can hear me…raise your hand.”  
  
A few seconds passed.  Alma watched Yuu with anticipation, waiting.  His breath was still.  
  
Slowly, a hand raised.  
  
A beat, and then Alma’s face lit up, his heart swelling with uncontainable elation.  
  
“You did it!” Alma exclaimed, as he leaned over the pool even more.  His bright eyes seemed to sparkle in the darkness, and a vibrant smile stretched across his face.  “I’m so happy!  I was worried I was the only one!”  
  
The hand moved, and pointed at finger at Alma.  Beneath the water, Alma could see a confused gaze staring back at him.  
  
Alma blinked.  “Me?”  He asked, before he realized what Yuu was probably trying to communicate.  Suddenly, Alma felt oddly self-conscious, and smiled sheepishly.  “Oh!  Sorry, I guess I’m a little shy after all,” He explained, blushing.  “But…they told me my name is Alma.”  
  
Yuu tried to move, but didn’t appear to be entirely coherent yet.  Alma quickly took hold of his hand, a part of him fearful that if he didn’t that the other apostle might fall back asleep again.  
  
As Alma gripped Yuu’s hand, he paused. A strange sense of familiarity flooded him, and for a second he thought he saw something like…flowers.  
  
But, there were no flowers in the lab, and Alma couldn’t have seen them.  
  
The sensation was quickly forgotten as Alma focused his attention back on Yuu, helping the other apostle to crawl out of the water. Alma’s heart thudded in his chest excitedly, and his eyes danced with elation. “Happy Birthday, Yuu!”  
  
Somehow, Alma had always known Yuu would be the one to wake up. Somehow.

 


End file.
